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Sunday, January 30, 2005

Speaking of hairy snatches--if you're ever dating a woman and you haven't slept with her yet because you're afraid she has a hairy snatch, a good way to find out whether her snatch is in fact hairy is to stick your hand down her pants while she's distracted1 and yell out, "Hairy or no?"2

In this way, you'll be able to avoid the awkward situation of asking such a personal question before you've been intimate with each other. An added benefit of this method is that technically, you're asking permission, so it's not rude. Also, if she's distracted enough3, she won't notice, and you won't have to bother her in order to find out the answer to this most important question of questions.

1For example, while she's ordering from the menu.

2The correct answer is, of course, a closely cropped no.

3By, for example, the fact that the restaurant serves duck l'orange.