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Thursday, February 02, 2006

I announced Lan's abortion solution in class last night.

The solution, if you haven't heard it, is that if anyone wants to have an abortion, they should have to eat the aborted fetus afterwards.

This will placate pro-choicers, because they still have the option to have an abortion. Conversely, it will quiet pro-lifers because they'll see that if someone does choose to have an abortion, they'll be punished with one of the most gruesome acts imaginable as a matter of consequence.

"See?" I concluded. "It works out perfectly!"

"Chris," YO began, "there are so many reasons why that wouldn't really work. . . ."


Blogger Ben said...

Holy shit, I am so for that.

3:30 PM  
Blogger Cibbuano said...

I dunno, doesn't the Catholic church have something to say about cannibalism?

I direct you to Candace Cameron's website:

Full House

Oh, if you don't know, Candace Cameron is the actress that played one of the daughters on 'Full House'. Now, she's married a hockey player and she's a krazy Khristian!

Take the 'Are you a good person test'

7:44 PM  
Blogger Ben said...

Yeah, I went and looked that up, and you're right.

I guess we're going to have to go back to plan A: sitting at the lunch counter until we get the sandwiches we ordered!

Wait, what egregious injustice are we talking about?

8:10 PM  
Blogger Cibbuano said...

we were talking about getting our damn sandwiches! What kind of service is this?

I'm only tipping 10%. Feel my wrath!

8:57 PM  
Blogger Nick Lavender said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:14 AM  
Blogger Nick Lavender said...

I break almost all the Commandments every day.

4:15 AM  
Blogger Ben said...

Go to Confession, Nick.

And go to Confession, Cib. 10%? Your sins reek to high heaven! No one likes a cheapskate...

Though... these sandwiches are kinda bullshit. How hard is it to stack meat and lettuce on bread?!

12:40 PM  
Blogger Christopher Zane said...

Apparently, I'm a murderer.

And as we all know, murder is defined as "when you hate your brother."

Now I know why all those people were yelling "Murderer!" at me the other day! It wasn't because of my mink coat after all!

12:48 PM  
Blogger Lan D. Ho! said...

It may have been that delicious, delicious fetus you were chowing down on.

"We put the 'deli' in 'delicious'!"

4:50 PM  
Blogger Cibbuano said...

Wait... is this fetus in this sandwich??

I'm going to complain to the management! Expect a 5% tip from me, you child-killers.

9:28 PM  

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